Choosing to be happy.

When I was 13 I began to self-harm. Whatever I could do to feel pain, I did it. Cutting, burning, hitting, scratching, whatever it took. I had a friend at my school who told me and a few of our mutual friends that she did. Being the impressionable 11 year old that I was...I got trapped in the horrible world of self-harm. Before I go on let me clear up some misconceptions.
1. It is an illness, not for attention, okay Maybe when I was 11, a small part of me was seeking attention; but 11 years later I think we can rule that out.
2. I am not attempting suicide, I do not wish I was dead, nor
Do I dislike myself. If I knew why I did it I would tell you, trust me.
3. I have sought help many times and I am very happy with my current psychologist, I have been clean for 6 months now.
4. It's almost a feeling of like swelling, I know that sounds weird but hear me out. I feel like I am almost going to pop, there is just so much emotion inside of me, I have to let it out. Some people smoke, go running, or lift weights. I chose a not so healthy option..

Honestly, I do not feel like my illness has effected my Life greatly. I do not openly share it with friends, so it does not effect my relationships. When I told my boyfriend he did not judge me, or think I was just seeking attention. But now, when I get urges I have someone to call :)
My parents found out about my problem soon after it started and I definitely noticed a change in the way they treat me. They tiptoed around me, always asked me what I was feeling,
And the worst part? They felt like it was all their fault! Like they did something wrong. After them
coming to a few of my sessions with me my psychologist and I soon got them to understand that there was nothing that they did wrong! I love my parents very much and my daddy is my best friend.
I can either choose to let my illness effect my happiness or stay strong and try my hardest to stay clean.
Thank you for reading!

Blog 2

First off, I definitely think every parent should have "the talk" with their chid. Why? It's AWKWARD! No child wants it to happen! Therefore, if they want advice, need birth control, or just have questions, the last person they aregoing to go to is their parent! That being said, let's continue..

I really do not think that the talk should happen at home if their is family around. Who wants to be having that talk with their parent and dad/mom comes and plopls on the couch?
I think if it happens at a more neutral place both individuals can be more at ease. Also, sitting on the couch just talking about it may make it more difficult, more nerve wracking. I think walking around the mall, shopping, talking, and stopping off at the food court for lunch will make it seem like it's not that big of a deal and it's nothing to get nervous about.

Points that I think the parent should make:

• Sex is natural, it's nothing to be scared or nervous about.
• Sex is a sacred bond that two people that are deeply in love should share, it should take place with someone you sincerely love.
• You will NEVER forget your first time, or first person..Think hard before you do it.
• There are many different types of birth control. A path that you will only have to change once a week. A pill that you must take ever day at the same time, a shot that you go to a doctor for that you don't have to remember to give yourself.
• Several different cap like objects that you put in place before sex and remove after. Beware, they must be put in correctly or may not work.
• If a woman is not trying to get pregnant, there is no medical reason for her to have a period.
• Birth control (besides the caps) can reduce the heavyness and occurrence of periods. They can also help to reduce the side effects of PMS. Therefore, it is recommended that you start birth control. Besides the benefits of birth control, of course they prevent unwanted pregnancy, you never know when it will happen, whether it is planned, with someone you love, or a terrible mistake you need to be protected from unwanted pregnancy.
• You should ALWAYS use a condom, NO exception. They prevent STD'S and infection. None of the above stated birth controls will prevent STD's.

Health Issue

The health issue I am most concerned about is birthing. While taking Intro to Women's Studies I became very concerned about this topic.I learned that C-sections most often occur late at night and early in the morning, essentially doctors have been at work either all day or all night and they do not want to have to wait on a birth. There are many women who have actually had forced C-sections, these women expressed there denial of a C-section and later were told that there might be some complications so they wanted them in the operating room just in case. Then, the women wake up in recovery and realize they had a C-section. There was even one case that I read about where the nurse was putting a mask over the expecting mother's face, she said it was oxygen since her levels were low. The next thing she knew, she woke up and had had a C-section. This has got to stop! Also, why are women made to believe that having a baby is such a medical emergency? There is nothing wrong with you, you are having a baby which is very natural, why do you need an IV? Why do you need potocin to speed up conttractions? The baby will come in due time when he/she is ready! Now I am not saying that all women should just stay at home, squat on the kitched floor and have their baby. There are women tht are high risk that need to be in a hosital.
INTERVIEWS:
my mom (Pamela Foster) caucasian:
I am most concerned about breast cancer. I feel like even though there is plenty of awareness so many women still do not pay attention to their bodies and perform breast exams. What is it going to take to get women to listen? There are too many women getting diagnosed when it is too late!
Best Friend (Eugenia Gil) El Salvadorian and Cuban:
Availability of health care is a major issue, how are women supposed to take care of their bodies, minimize the spread of disease, and take care of their children when they do not have sufficient healthcare?

COMMENTS:
My mom's interview differed from my mind as we were concerned with two totally different topics, but I think Eugenia's issues pertain to mine. I wish more women could stay at home or at a birthing center, relax, and have their baby the way they want to. How are women supposed to do that without proper health insurance, even though home births and birthing centers are much cheaper! But if a woman walks into an emergency room in labor, no hopsital can legally turn her away regardless of her insurance. Yeah, she's going to have an outstanding balance($) with the hospital, but hey atleast she had her baby right?

About Me!

My name is JoEllen Marie Foster, I was born in St. Croix, Virgin Islands and raised in North Miami, Florida. I am black, white, and Native American (blackfoot). My parents have been together for 39 years and they are both originally from Texas. I have been in Texas for 8 years; sad to say, I do not like Texas at all! It's way too hot, and there are no beaches, I tried going to Galveston to get a taste of home, it was not what I expected! The water looks gross, and there was no sand...There was mushy gross looking stuff! But, I did meet the man of my dreams here (I know, that's terribly corny). I hope to be engaged and married by the end of this year. He is in the army and I cannot deal with him being across the world and me not being able to be with him! One thing that makes me unique is my love for peircings and tattoos; I currently have only two tattoos and 11 piercings.

I have the sweetest Rottweiler ever named Xena, she is three and I have had her since she was 4 months, I found her on the side of the highway in Tyler, Tx. She is the sweetest girl ever and I love her so much! My hobbies are reading (I do that alot), going to the dog park with Xena, SHOPPING, eating, and cooking. I have been attending T-DUB since my first freshman year of college, my major was originially pre-med, then nursing, and no Health Studies. I would like to get my masters in Healthcare Administration and run a facility for children with mental disabilities, handicaps, or just those that are medically fragile; I have a passion for children on the autism spectrum. My expectations from this class are to learn about the feminist agenda as it relates to healthcare.